You do realize that your cock is small, don’t you? C’mon, I know you do! Have you ever thought about where it falls on the scale of smallness? Maybe you are like a hotdog or perhaps a Vienna sausage. Why don’t you try the Coke bottle test? If your wee weenie can slip easily into the opening of the bottle, you are laughably tiny! Even if you use some lube to get it in, the fact that it fits is the worst part.

Now, if you can actually jerk off into the bottle you have the puniest of peens. This explains a lot of things. There is no way for you to be a real man with a Thumbelina dick. When you see the real men in the locker room at the gym, they are not small. Coke bottle pricks do not get you laid. You know that all too well. Remember this the next time your alleged girlfriend sashays out the front door dressed all sexy. She’s not going to fuck a Coke bottle dick!!!